Why aren't you a Trump supporter?

I know that sounds DO NOT cause cancer.

Fuck that piece of orange shit, fuck his idiocracy, fuck his sexism, fuck his racism, fuck his religionism, fuck his divisionism, fuck his lying, fuck his orange face paint, fuck his worship of Cult of Ignorance, fuck his Cult, fuck his jingoistic horseshit, fuck his manuipulations, fuck his toddler-age WIMPism, fuck his fucked-up values of ME ME ME and did I mention ME, and fuck him personally with a giant razor sharp dildo that’s been preheated to 204.7° F and built to the dimensions of the Washington Monument. Slowly.

I know the difference between Sioux City and Sioux Falls and even Sioux Center

What are your political and economic beliefs? How did you form them, especially in comparison to those who hold opposing views?

I understand how hurricane paths work

I have complete contempt for fakery

I can read

It’s been over a month since I stopped taking sertraline but why do I still feel side effects like brain zaps and anxiety mood changes? The root cause of anxiety it’s your thinking and I perfectly master that better than before so it’s hard lately.

It’s uncool to set up soft porn pics with your own preteen daughter

When I go Greenland shopping and Denmark says no I don’t melt down like a fucking WIMP

It’s uncool to lurk around teenage girls’ dressing rooms

Why do very skinny girls get more male attention if it is true that men like curves?

I don’t respect a sleazeball who lies about his height just so he can lie about his weight

I know what Nikki Haley’s authority with the National Guard is

I can count

Can you tell me a depressing story?

I don’t hide in my hotel room while everybody else keeps the appointed time and place because my hair might get wet

If someone works for me, I actually pay them

I don’t believe that Saudi Arabia and Russia “will vedoop bedeep uhhhh”

How can I navigate a romantic relationship as a trans person, and what are some common challenges that I might face?

I understand that you can’t inject bleach or light

I have no sicko desire to control women or have a bizarro hangup with “blood”

I understand historical events enough to know there were no airports in the eighteenth century, that Canada didn’t burn the White House half a century before it existed and that World War Two already happened

Can cheating be a result of not truly loving or caring for someone, or is it sometimes just a spur of the moment decision?

Let us count the ways. Captain Obvious says:

I don’t hold serial bankrupters in high regard

I understand that when you lose an election you step the fuck aside and take it like a man rather than invade the Capitol while your loss is being made official just because you’re a fucking snowflake WIMP

Why has no country adopted the SA80/L85 rifle?

I actually pay taxes

I don’t believe Nazis, Klan klowns and white supremacists chanting “Jews will not replace us” comprise “very fine people”

I know the difference between “give me your tired, your poor” and “they’re poisoning our blood”

Don't you think Democrats are so full of it stool softener and an enema couldn't help them?

authoritarians can get down on the floor and bite my ass, yesterday

EVEN FUCKING MIKE PENCE understands that

I see through liars

Why are right-wing commentators spreading conspiracy theories about Haitians eating local pets in Springfield, Ohio?

I don’t respect shameless hucksters who try to sell a vitamin where you have to mail in your pee

I took the same Oath and took it seriously

I have complete contempt for traitorism

Is Twilight appropriate for a 12-year-old?

I don’t call Tim Cook “Tim Apple” and if I do I don’t deny what’s right there on the videotape because I’m too much of a fucking WIMP to handle Reality

I have complete contempt for intentional stupidity

I don’t buy bullshit

What is the most gay experience with your dad?

I respect other cultures and don’t respect those who don’t

When a reporter declines to join me in the rooftops fantasy I don’t go on stage and gyrate to mock his congenital disability

I don’t believe in asking the people of Iowa “how stupid are the people of Iowa”

A real man doesn’t grab women by the p***y

I know that he didn’t run against “Obamna”

I don’t cotton to rapists

I know the difference between “George Bush” and “Jeb Bush”

I have an acute aversion to scumbags

I respect women and don’t respect those who don’t

I’ve never tried to pretend the word would means wouldn’t

I know who the president of Turkey really is

I don’t believe there is a fucking “president of the Virgin Islands”

I don’t buy made-up stories of “thousands and thousands of people dancing on rooftops”

I don’t run and hide from a debate like a fucking WIMP just becuase some moderator asked pointed questions

I don’t watch or listen to advertising

I have complete contempt for fraudsters, and even less for repeat ones

I know that if I or anyone I know commits a crime we’ll go to the clink

I didn’t get out of military service with fucking “bone spurs” that I paid a doctor to write

Those are a few reasons off the top of my head. How ’bout you?

I have a reading level above third grade

I know there’s no such thing as invisible planes

I understand geography enough to know that Belgium is not a “beautiful city”, that Paris is not in fucking Germany, that India does share a border with China, that that border is peppered with Bhutan and Nepal, not “Button” and “Nipple”, that time zones exist, that “shithole countries” do not, that “England” and “the UK” are not the same thing, that you cannot build a wall in Colorado to keep out New Mexico, and that the Bronx is not and has never been “a very wonderful place in fucking Germany”

I understand that you can’t just fucking nuke a hurricane

I don’t believe the way to respond to a hurricane is to call a press conference to describe it as “wet from the standpoint of water”, to distribute Play Doh, or to stand at a podium throwing rolls of paper towels as if they were bottles of ketchup

I don’t pretend not to know who David Dooky is just because he can deliver votes